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Elizabeth Culmer, only a *little* bit crazy...
01 January 2037 @ 01:01 am
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Master List of Elizabeth Culmer's Fiction
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FANFICTION:

General Disclaimer: These stories are based on characters and situations created and owned by other people and corporations. I make no money from this borrowing of intellectual property, and intend no copyright or trademark infringement.

Organization: This list is organized primarily by fandom; within each fandom, it's arranged first by associated story cycles and then by writing date. Word counts and writing dates are approximations.

Content/Warning Policy: 1) I am not consistent about warnings! I use them when I remember, for a few relatively broad categories of potentially problematic content, but if something is off-page, non-explicit, or generally backgrounded, I probably won't think to note it in the metadata. Read at your own risk! 2) The things I try to warn for are explicit sex, rape, murder, torture, cannibalism, incest, depression/suicide, familial dysfunction, and occasionally also societal dysfunction (aka dystopia). Sometimes I just slap a general content warning on all my fic for a given fandom and don't label each individual fic. I also don't generally warn for violence, unless the violence in a fic is dramatically out-of-step with the violence in its source canon. 3) I don't use any content rating system unless I'm posting to a site or community that requires or encourages ratings, because I find movie-style ratings counter-intuitive when applied to written fiction, and not particularly useful for anything other than denoting the presence of explicit sex, which I already note in the metadata.

Quality Rating System: I've marked my favorite stories with asterisks, on a scale of 1 to 4. The more asterisks, the more I like the story. This doesn't necessarily mean that stories without asterisks are bad, just that I don't like them as much. Also, I am not claiming to be an arbiter of taste; you may love stories I dislike, and vice versa. I am just providing a heads-up about the ones that I think are best written and/or most interesting.

Where To Read: What I post on my journal tends to be the equivalent of a beta draft. If I have cross-posted a story literally anywhere else (except Tumblr; fic content there is just a mirror of fic content here), read the version that isn't on my journal. Versions on AO3 are definitive. If there is no AO3 version, read the ff.net version. If there is no ff.net version, read the FictionAlley version (only applicable for HP fic). Failing that, read the journal version, because that's the only one there is.

Harry Potter Fanfiction

Naruto Fanfiction

Angel Sanctuary Fanfiction

Chronicles of Narnia Fanfiction

Homestuck Fanfiction

MCU fanfic (assorted)

Minor Fandom Fanfiction
(currently includes BtVS/A:tS, The Dark Is Rising, the Darkangel trilogy, Enchanted Forest Chronicles, FF7: Mercverse AU, Inception, and Star Trek: AOS)

Miscellaneous Fanfiction
(Currently includes: American Gods, An Ash-Blonde Witch, Arthurian Mythology, Batman, the Bible, the Black Jewels series, the Bourne trilogy, Charlotte's Web, Code Geass, Death Note, Discworld, Doctor Who, Girl Genius, The Girl with the Silver Eyes, Glee, Gormenghast, Hamilton, Hexwood, The Homeward Bounders, Howl's Moving Castle, Labyrinth, Lord of the Rings, Lucifer (comics), Mad Max: Fury Road, Merlin, the Oz books, Ranma 1/2, Rise of the Guardians, Sailor Moon, Saiyuki, Seaward, Shakespeare, Star Wars, Tam Lin (Pamela Dean), White Collar, Wolf Hall, X-Men, and Yu-Gi-Oh!)

Crossover Fanfiction
(I do not cross-list crossovers and fusions under their component fandoms; this is the only place to find them. Currently includes: the Anita Blake series, ASoIaF, Avatar: The Last Airbender, the Black Jewels series, BtVS, Cardcaptor Sakura, Chronicles of Narnia, the Darkangel trilogy, The Dark Is Rising, Discworld, Doctor Who, Enchanted Forest Chronicles, Ender's Game, Gundam Wing, Harry Potter, Hikaru no Go, Homestuck, Inception, the Indiana Jones movies, Leverage, Lucifer (comics), MCU (various), Merlin, Naruto, the Oz books, Sandman, Stargate: SG-1, Star Trek: AOS, Vorkosigan Saga, Welcome to Night Vale, and a couple other things that only appear in memes rather than actual fic.)

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ORIGINAL FICTION:

These stories are all mine! *grin* I use the same warning policy and quality rating system as for my fanfiction.

All Original Fiction

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My various bingo cards: Cotton Candy Bingo, Round One (blackout!); Cotton Candy Bingo, Round Two (blackout!); Genprompt Bingo, Round 12 (blackout!); Genprompt Bingo, Round 15; Ladies Bingo; Daredevil Bingo; Domestic AU Prompt List

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Current Location: ithaca, ny
Current Mood: calmcalm
 
 
Elizabeth Culmer, only a *little* bit crazy...
21 May 2019 @ 09:26 pm
I was wondering to myself why I'd had such vivid and, um, sexually-charged dreams the past two nights... and then today my body basically waved a giant flag embroidered with "ATTENTION: YOU ARE OVULATING!" in my face. Which explains a lot.

*sigh*

I may not have a completely regular menstrual cycle, but I always know within a day or so when my period is going to start. My body is not subtle about these things.

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Current Location: ithaca, ny
Current Mood: annoyedannoyed
 
 
Elizabeth Culmer, only a *little* bit crazy...
Today was a bit of a mixed bag at work: I had periods when I could breathe, but also periods when everything happened at once and even with three people in the office it felt like we needed more hands.

Also there was a specific task I wanted to get done in the morning before Mom Boss and Aunt Boss arrived, but due to technical difficulties (aka Mom Boss's color printer pitching a fit, and my color printer having forgotten how to access its colored ink cartridges) I couldn't get past step one. *sigh* And a different task I wanted to get started on in the evening fell by the wayside because I had a stack of sublet forms to process instead, and then sorting out three different kinds of tenant-and-key shenanigans ate my remaining half hour. *deeper sigh*

Oh well, there's always Thursday.

And apparently I'll get some overtime next week as we start summer turnovers and students leave Ithaca after commencement weekend. So there's that.

Now I am off to bed, because the weather is cooling back down to normal spring temperatures instead of Sunday's random blast of July and I was able to turn my AC off and won't need to be running the fan in my bedroom -- which has settled down enough that it's just loud on its highest speed setting (and that is annoying in its own right), but continues to make distressing noises on medium or low. I definitely need to by a replacement. *deepest sigh*

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Current Location: ithaca, ny
Current Mood: okayokay
 
 
Elizabeth Culmer, only a *little* bit crazy...
19 May 2019 @ 11:51 pm
Things done today:

1. Was about ten minutes late leaving for church (stuff happens, whatever) and thus wound up spending the service helping my hospitality team set up for coffee hour and generally wandering about the parlor instead of sneaking into the sanctuary. My official hospitality duties were just to bring snacks and to clean up during and after coffee hour, but this is not the first time I've pitched in for general setup just because.

2. After we finished the dishes and other cleanup, I went up to the annex for the budget presentation meeting, but only hung around for about ten minutes since I already knew the information being presented (on account of sitting in at last week's Board of Trustees meeting) and didn't feel I had much to contribute.

3. Moved my transplanted tomatoes and my clementine outside for a few hours in the afternoon, until an approaching thunderstorm made me bring them back indoors.

4. Turned my mattress and switched out my comforter for my lightweight summer blanket. Also changed my other linens.

5. Took a nap.

6. LAUNDRY, including the comforter and my winter coat.

7. Took recycling out to the curb for collection.

8. Did a bit of impromptu pruning on one of the trees that grow in the verge between the sidewalk and the street, since its branches were hanging awfully low over the sidewalk and my driveway.

9. Sat on the front porch with Wilson (my diagonal neighbors' cat) on my shoulder for about half an hour. It was highly therapeutic.

10. Turned on my air conditioner and set up my fans. Also took one fan apart in an attempt to get it to stop making distressing noises when turned on (by means of liberal application of WD-40 to the spinny bits and also trying to remove gunk with a paper towel), but that doesn't seem to have worked, alas. I may have to buy a replacement. Ugh. Why is planned obsolescence a thing?

11. Some minor general cleaning.

And now I am going to bed. :)

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Current Location: ithaca, ny
Current Mood: tiredtired
 
 
Elizabeth Culmer, only a *little* bit crazy...
18 May 2019 @ 07:17 pm
*screams quietly into the void*

...

...

...

Okay, I'm all right now. And the chaos did calm down by about 4:00pm. But from 10:15am through about 2:00pm were awful, and I actually locked the office from 2:00 to 2:30pm to have lunch, which I usually don't bother doing. See, usually weekends are slow enough that I don't mind getting one or two interruptions while I'm eating, because they will be quick and minor, like people coming in to pick up packages. (Also it's less annoying to stay open than it is to have to deal with shipping company deliveries coming while I'm closed.) But today I needed a solid period of NO HUMANS, and since I am legally allowed one, I took it.

Anyway, I rented an apartment, answered a bunch of inquiries, processed a lot of payments, received a lot of keys and damage deposit return address forms, finished building a spreadsheet I will start using next week, checked out carts and vacuum cleaners, and so on and so forth.

I also resorted to singing "I am going to murder people! Murder, murder, murder!" in a bright and cheerful tone at multiple times during the day. It relieves stress. :)

(Sometimes I catch myself doing that and switch to muttering, "No, murder is bad. I will bake them brownies. So many brownies. Brownies until they get sick and puke and go away..." and then I realize that my attempt at positivity is going sadly astray. *wry*)

...

Anyway, tonight I am actually going to bake brownies, but not murder brownies. Just snacks for coffee hour at church tomorrow morning, since my hospitality team is on call for the next three weeks. :)

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Current Location: ithaca, ny
Current Mood: stressedstressed
 
 
 
Elizabeth Culmer, only a *little* bit crazy...
17 May 2019 @ 08:39 pm
Today was yet another nibbled-to-death-by-ducks day. :(

This whole week has been one damn thing after another, and of course the worst part is that I almost never get to finish a task before getting interrupted by something else. A smooth progression of finishing Thing A, moving on to Thing B, then on to Thing C after Thing B is done, and so on would be full but not nearly so frustrating as starting Thing A, getting interrupted by Thing B, getting interrupted by Thing C, going back to try finishing Thing B, getting interrupted again by Thing D, deciding Thing D can be postponed for a bit, finally finishing Thing B, going back to try finishing Thing A, getting interrupted by Thing E, going back to finally finish Thing A, moving on to Thing D, getting interrupted by Thing F... *sigh* You get the picture.

I would like all the students to be gone and all our apartments to be rented already, please and thank you.

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Current Location: ithaca, ny
Current Mood: draineddrained
 
 
Elizabeth Culmer, only a *little* bit crazy...
I think the most annoying thing about not having a trained and competent coworker and also not working overtime is that when I get to work on Thursday, after my two days off, there is always a backlog of stuff on my desk, and no way to know beforehand what kind of stuff it will be. And while Mom Boss is organized and leaves clear notes with all her stacks of paperwork to process, Aunt Boss is emphatically not, and figuring out what she wants me to do with which piles of stuff is an adventure. *sigh*

Anyway, today my main task was processing approved summer sublet forms. This has five steps: 1) scan them, upload them to Rent Manager, and file an electronic copy on our shared office drive; 2) in Rent Manager, attach them to the relevant apartment, and create the subtenant and/or assign them to the apartment if they already exist in the program; 3) add the subtenant to the 2019 summer subtenant Excel spreadsheet (and send a copy to the concierges at one of our buildings); 4) email the tenants and subtenant a copy of the approved form with a boilerplate letter; and 5) once all that is done, stamp the form and file the paper copy because paperless offices are a myth.

You will note that the Excel spreadsheet is basically duplicating the Rent Manager data. This is because until 2019, we didn't put summer subtenants into Rent Manager or FileMaker, because it seemed kind of silly to have them hanging around forever when their residency can be as brief as three weeks. We're testing a new system this year, but keeping the Excel spreadsheet as a backup. *deeper sigh*

I'm just glad I don't have to do the FileMaker entries as well. That is Mom Boss's problem, and I couldn't absorb that task if I wanted to -- I don't have the necessary permissions to edit tenant data in that program. (I can do whatever the hell I want to package data, but that's a different subsection.)

Anyway, in the event I only got through about 2/3 of the sublease forms, because I kept getting interrupted by other things. It was another nibbled-to-death-by-ducks day. To wit: rent payments, inquiries about rent payment discount options, tours for random potential tenants, packages, the copier/printer ran out of toner and I had to replace the cartridge, people coming in to drop off keys and/or ask move-out questions, people coming in to drop off new sublet forms, etcetera ad infinitum. And then Mom Boss and Aunt Boss left shortly before 3pm to attend a meeting of indefinite length, which apparently ran long enough that they didn't bother coming back to the office afterwards so I was entirely on my own for the last 4.5 hours of the work day. *deepest sigh*

Ah well, at least it was finally warm!

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Current Location: ithaca, ny
Current Mood: tiredtired
 
 
Elizabeth Culmer, only a *little* bit crazy...
14 May 2019 @ 09:37 pm
What I did today:

1. Sorted through my giant pile of stuff-to-be-washed and got the equivalent of three loads into my laundry bag (and the bag into my laundry cart) so I can drag it out the door tomorrow morning and actually wash stuff. I should have done this last week after Susan returned to NJ, but it felt like a Major Task so I just kept putting it off. In the event, I think the whole mess took all of fifteen minutes, which is how these things tend to work out. *sigh*

2. Folded and put away the blankets Susan used during her visit, which I'd also been putting off.

3. Watered my houseplants.

4. Weekly grocery run. \o/

5. Paid my monthly credit card and health insurance bills.

6. Sat in on my congregation's monthly Board of Trustees meeting, since barring random acts of god, I will be elected for a one-year term at the annual meeting later this month. It was pretty much what I expected, to be honest, but it's always interesting to see how the sausage gets made, as it were. *wry*

7. Continued reading The Invention of Air.

8. Helped Mom choose a restaurant for when she and Dad visit in early June.

And now I am off to bed, because it was still raining for 90% of today and I am still tired despite getting a bunch of much-needed sleep last night.

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Current Location: ithaca, ny
Current Mood: mellowmellow
 
 
Elizabeth Culmer, only a *little* bit crazy...
13 May 2019 @ 07:55 pm
I don't feel like I had all that much to do at work today? And yet I got hardly any free time after 10:30am and am super-tired tonight.

I mean, I will cheerfully blame a third of the tiredness on the fact that it's been raining all day (and all day yesterday as well; remind me why I live in Ithaca again???), but that leaves two thirds a mystery.

I guess on reflection it was a nibbled-to-death-by-ducks sort of day and I just didn't notice at the time because... blah blah some reason. *hands* Life is weird. Brains are weird.

I'm just going to finish dinner and fall into bed and hopefully things will make a little more sense in the morning.

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Current Location: ithaca, ny
Current Mood: exhaustedexhausted
 
 
Elizabeth Culmer, only a *little* bit crazy...
10 May 2019 @ 07:54 pm
Today. Has been. A DAY.

*flops exhaustedly over the keyboard*

This is the time of year when we make and distribute move-out information packets, which is a GIANT PAIN IN THE NECK. And also in the back. Specifically my back. Because I'm the one who has to go slide them under apartment doors in all the buildings that don't have mail rooms. ARGH.

Also people are suddenly realizing the school year is just about over and are all rushing at once to finalize summer sublets and rent parking spaces for the fall. Plus the June 1st quarterly rent payments are coming due, so there's that mess as well.

In short, it's just been one damn thing after another all day long, and tomorrow will be more of the same but I will be on my own without backup. *sigh*

Ah well, I've survived this crunch before and I will survive it again. And it will pass. All things do. :)

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Current Location: ithaca, ny
Current Mood: draineddrained